Monday, April 23, 2012

Us


This past weekend, my awesome husband surprised me with a mini getaway.  I could tell something was in the works and I was excited, but since having four small children....my spontaneity has dwindled a bit.  Therefore, I was a little nervous about being "whisked away" overnight without being involved in the planning.

We had an amazing time!  We attended a marriage seminar by Mark Gungor (founder of Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage-definitely check it out).  It was hilarious, enlightening and refreshing.  That night, we stayed in an executive suite with an in-room jacuzzi at a hotel, which thankfully my frugal husband used his points to get for free.  My bag and our baby's bag (who joined us since I am nursing) was very precisely packed.  All matching accessories included.  I was amazed!  Needless to say, it was such a great and much needed time together.

I remember years ago, in my B.C. (before children) days, I was talking with a co-worker of mine.  She had five children and said she had not been on a date alone with her husband since their first child was born.  I was flabbergasted.  Here I was, a (childless) newlywed who went out almost nightly with my husband.....I couldn't imagine.

Then....we had children.  Four of them within four and a half years to be exact.  You mommies out there can relate.  Diapers, discipline, messes, potty training, "mommy mommy", etc.   It's difficult to to find time and ENERGY to give to your spouse after taking care of all of the urgent needs of children during the day.  Many times us moms want to be left alone on a deserted island after so much interaction and occassional chaos.

We ended up like my former co-worker and didn't do the best job of preserving our "US" time in the early stages of parenting.  It was (and still can be) very challenging.  I am so thankful that we now have an amazing babysitter and family who help us to better do that.  I love being able to spend time alone with my best friend and the man I couldn't wait to spend my life with.

We are loving this parenting journey together (challenges and all) and these little girls have captured our hearts.  We know, however, that someday they are going to move on and have their own lives : (  It will be just "US" again and we don't want to look at each other and have to ask "who are you?"

So, mommies, I want to encourage you today to reevaluate your relationship and time with your "honey".  If you are like I have been at times and many other tired mommies and have had the tendency to give your leftovers to your spouse - today is a new day.  Keep loving and caring for your babies as well as you do, but don't forget the guy who helped you get them here [or helps your raise them if you're adoptive parents] : )

Next Monday, I want to share some ideas and resources that we have tried to implement to stay connected, have fun and grow together.


2 comments:

Adventures In Babywearing said...

I am so glad you had that get away! And as the kids get older, it does get so much easier. But so important that you are tending to each other in the meantime. Love to you!

Steph

Tonia said...

Thanks for your encouragement Stephanie. I imagine it does get easier as the little ones get a bit more independent. It's hard to leave tiny babies behind : ( I always love reading your blog and seeing your pictures on the 4th. It encourages me to capture the moments that are passing so quickly.